Worried about someone you know?

People take drugs for lots of reasons. Having a better idea of why your friend takes drugs will help you if you decide to talk to them about it.

To socialise

Some people take drugs occasionally to have fun, socialise and relax. Taking drugs might not become a problem for these people, and they’ll probably stop when they’re ready to. You can still remind your friend that some drugs are illegal and can affect their physical and mental health, especially if they’re still growing. Research strongly indicates that your brain doesn’t stop developing until you’re around 25 and using can potentially restrict neural development.

To escape

Some people use drugs to escape difficult feelings that they're struggling to cope with. They might be depressed, anxious or insecure, and they might think the drugs are helping them - when they’re actually making things worse. If you think this is the case, talk calmly to your friend and look for ways to help them think about why they're using drugs and ways they can manage without them. You can get in contact with student wellbeing to let them know about your concerns for your friend.

To fit in

Some people take drugs to fit in, or because they’re under pressure to do so by their friends. You could offer to do things with them that don’t involve using drugs. For example, you could suggest a study session in the library, or meeting them for coffee.

To experiment

Some people are just curious. They might try drugs once or twice to see what it’s like and then decide to leave it. Remember that most people who try drugs don’t continue using them

Worrying about a friend’s drug use is stressful, and how you choose to deal with it is up to you. You might try to help your friend, you might decide to put up with it and not say much, or you might decide to step back and not offer much support.

There are pros and cons to each of these choices, and it’s essential you think of your own wellbeing when you decide on which approach to take. It may be that you need support and/or professional help yourself too. You can find out more about where to get support for yourself below.

Having a conversation with a friend

Drugs can be a hard subject to discuss, especially if you think your friend has a problem. There’s no right or wrong way to talk about drugs, but there are some general guidelines you can follow to make things easier.

Do speak to your friend:

• When you’re both sober and not on drugs
• Somewhere private and familiar (your friend might become emotional)
• When you have plenty of time – it’s not a conversation you can rush
• More than once – you may need to have several conversations

Don't speak to your friend in a way that:

• Is judgmental or critical – it won’t help
• Doesn’t give them time to talk – try to speak less and listen more
• Assumes superiority – don’t act like you know better (even if that’s what you think)

Remember that you can’t force your friend to do anything they don’t want to do, but you can make sure they know where to get accurate information about what they’re using, and that there is help available if they want it. Let them know you’re around and happy to talk – that you’re there to help and not judge, and are just worried about them.

Signposting to support services

There are a number of sources of information and support available- you can find out more about these on our Support Services page here.

If you’re worried about a friend who is a Royal Holloway student, you can make a confidential referral to the Wellbeing team, who will reach out to your friend directly to offer some support. You may also like to offer to help your friend make a phone call or appointment to Wellbeing themselves (or another support service e.g. doctors).

If your friend needs medical help – either from a clinic or an ambulance – it’s essential that you tell the people helping everything you know about the drugs they’ve taken.

And if you have any drugs left, hand them over to the medics as it may help them understand the problem.

They won't tell the police and you won’t get into trouble.

If your friend is caught with drugs, they might get into trouble. They might get a warning, an arrest, a formal caution or a conviction. This will depend on the drugs they’re caught with and what they’re doing with them.

If your friend is caught with drugs this could lead to a university misconduct hearing. Being found with drugs could lead to expulsion from halls, or even from your course. If you are found in possession of drugs which is thought to be for supply then this will be reported to the police. You can read more about the possible repercussions for using in the College Alcohol, Drugs & Substance Use & Misuse Policy.

If you’re supporting a friend with their alcohol or substance use issues, then this can be very draining and stressful, and you may find it having an impact on your own wellbeing. There are support services out there for you.

In the case of a crisis, find out where to get emergency help.

• Talk to Frank has a confidential helpline available 24/7 on 0300 123 6600 for general advice about drug-related issues.
• DrinkChat is an online chat service from Drinkaware that is available 24/7 for anyone worried about their own or someone else’s drinking.
• AdFam is a national charity which aims to improve the lives of those affected by a family member or friend’s drug and alcohol use. You can find out more about their support services here.
• Nacoa is the The National Association for Children of Alcoholics, and provides advice and support for anyone, of any age, affected by a parent’s drinking. You can contact their free helpline on 0800 358 3456.